Today I want to share with you all some very personal areas of my life. Overtime I have become very comfortable with myself, but I wasn’t always that way. I now speak at public events, I host multiple shows, I speak at a radio show, I perform on stage, I talk with confidence. But I wasn’t always like this. Today I will tell you some of the things that have helped me reach to where I am today.
I moved to Canada when I was 11 years old and begun grade 7 in a public school here. It was difficult to leave my circle of friends I had built up as a child back home and having studied in one of the better schools there. It was a big culture shock and a challenge to start school here and also getting used to some of the North American trends. Some way or the other, I struggled my way through junior high, senior high and university by trying to implement numerous ways to fit in and make friends. I spent most of my lunches in high school and university sitting in the library.
It was during university that I accepted that I don’t really want to keep trying to fit in. I want to be with myself, I like myself. I spent a lot of time just on my own without sharing anything with anyone. One time I remember, I was going home with my brother and he needed to pass by the library quickly. I hadn’t been to the library with so many people in a while at that time. I still went with him and had a nervous breakdown and began to cry. I went up to him and asked him if we could please go home. He got up immediately and we walked to his car. While driving he asked me with a worried tone, what happened to you, you are depressed. He tried quite hard to get me out of the house some way or the other and meet people.
I understood his stress for me and I decided to get a part time job in my last year which helped me quite a bit to grow out of my bubble. Graduating was an accomplishment for me as I had decided to complete my degree in a shorter period of time to leave as soon as possible. I can’t say I would ever want to relive my high school or university time as I truly did not enjoy it like most have.
A year later I was driving on a highway when I was struck with an accident. I was driving behind a truck carrying some aluminum bins, and ready to take the next exit when a bin rolled off of the truck. It was too late to change the lanes by then and I didn’t know what else to do. My immediate response was to slam on the brakes which led the vehicle to collapse and skid from one end of the highway to the other. Luckily I came out safe with only a swollen lip and a bruise. But what I did realize from that accident was that I was not scared for a single moment during the incident. The whole time my focus was to get the car to stop on one end. That was the day that led me to believe that I am a strong person. I discovered that I was not afraid to go back driving on the road despite the accident.
It made me a mature person and made me realize that everything does happen for a good reason. I felt confident going to the movie theatre on my own, to a restaurant on my own, without thinking twice or what other people would say. I stopped regretting my challenges I had faced in the last 10 years of my life in Canada and started to focus on me, my career and becoming a better person. Now I am participating in Miss World Canada and more than anything, I am excited for the experience it will bring with it. I am more excited than nervous, because I know that no matter how far I go, I will come back with a great learning experience.
It is these challenges that help us grow into a better person. We fall and we get up and learn to walk better and safer. We must learn to even cherish the downfalls in our lives as that is the only way we would have achieved the motivation to rise. We may not chose to believe it right away, but some way or the other, whatever happens is for the best. We cannot control life and death but we can control our thoughts and our decisions. We can change the way we think and how we perceive things. It’s up to us to see things negatively and keep going with hatred built inside us, or we can let it go, forgive others and ourselves, and move on a happier person, by appreciating the things we have. What do you chose?